life, Stories from the Island

Working Like a Maniac

Hen_and_Chicks_flowers

Dear Blogging Buddies,

In my very first post I mentioned that I would be taking 20 women to a big hotel on a small island for a weekend of teaching and refreshment.

The event is now one week away.

Needless to say, I will be working like a maniac between now and then and I expect to have no time for blogging.  But don’t despair, I will catch up with you as soon as I return.

Our group of fifty-something-year-old hens and twenty-something-year-old chicks will be stepping onto the Island Friday afternoon and departing Monday morning.  About half of my guests are women who have left a life of drugs and prostitution. They have been clean for at least three years.  They need to know some stuff.

Here’s a bit of what I will tell them:

  • Contrary to popular belief, man was not created first. God created men and women at the same time, with a joint purpose.   In this first session I am going to tell them a lot of things that will bring dignity to their lives.  I want to know how the truth resonates with them.  I want to know how they saw themselves growing up.  I want to know whether the Truth would have made any difference in their lives.  A woman who completed my Bible study a few years ago said it would have made a difference in her life.  A life that went like this:

I was molested as a child between the ages of eight and twelve years old, so at an early age I learned to equate love with men using my body for their sexual needs.  Add to that the fact that that I grew up in a world where the women were judged by the men in their life, by how many boyfriends they had and how sexually desirable men found them…

When I was about nine my adoptive mom and her new husband started going to church at a very fundamentalist church and were saved.  My mother would lock herself in her room for hours communing with God and leaving me alone with my step dad.   Most of the time, she wouldn’t even go to church.  My step dad would take me without her.  It was on the way to church or coming back that he would pull over and pull me onto his lap and “you know”….

I have allowed myself to be used and abused for as long as I can remember…

…My third son’s dad was charming and charismatic. The first time he hit me he actually convinced me that I smacked my own self upside the head with the phone receiver.

He was a child molesting meth addict who enjoyed beating the snot out of me and then having sex with me.

I spent a year and a half living one moment at a time trying to stay alive and keep my children alive.   I didn’t know that he was molesting my oldest son. I always assumed that boys were safe from that sort of thing.  My mother always told me that boys were blessings from God.   Surely God’s blessings were safe, right? I found out what he was when it was too late.

I have been hit, bit, kicked, dragged through the house by my hair, spit on and held at knife point while he tried to decide whether he wanted to slit my throat, cut the baby I was six months pregnant with or kill himself.  He is now in prison serving a sentence of 15-35 years for child molestation.  But it cost me my 2 oldest children.  Ironically, they went to live with my biological mother when the state took them from me for failure to protect…

As she handed me her typed story she said, “My mother always told me that boys were blessings from God.  My whole life I thought only boys were blessings.  I didn’t know until now that girls are blessings, too.”

I wonder whether the women I will meet next weekend know that girls are blessings, too.

  • Next I am going to show them when and how the whole man, woman, sex thing went awry.  And, as I showed you in this post, I am going show them that Adam was booted from the garden, not Eve.  Eve’s big mistake was making man her king.  I expect we’ll be talking a lot about that.
  • Because all of the women who came out of “the life” have been raped, I am going to tell them about Tamar and Dinah.  And I am going to tell them the story of my own poor heart.
  • Sunday night I am going to listen to their stories.  I am bringing a videographer to tape them.  With their permission, I will likely share them with you.

If you are the praying sort, I would love your prayers – for all the last minute preparations, for safe travel, for God’s blessing on each woman.

Keep blogging ’til I get back.  I’ll have a lot to read and I’ll have a lot to tell.

-trb

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26 thoughts on “Working Like a Maniac

  1. Marianne says:

    What a fantastic undertaking! You will do a great job. I’ll be sure to keep you in my prayers for healing all around as well as your prep, safety and blessings.

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  2. The above stories depicted here echo my own history and then some, would the “Truth” have made a difference? Definitely and the proof is that it has! I’ve shared openly with you, I don’t really know you I only know that I was prompted to by The Holy Spirit residing in me. Yet if you look at the comments above, all were responded to with ‘thanks’ except for one…one received an empty shallow feeble tap of a “like” key. I’ve opened my arms to you bared my heart and my soul as my Lord would have me do to no avail. You will most likely suppress this comment from being viewed. I am a real person, Anthony Gomez, Moncks corner, S.C., please take that into consideration in the future with others who might reach out to you. The pretense and superficiality of the whole “blogosphere experience seems to have taken a toll on me and thus I must let it go.
    Peace to you and God’s Blessings in future bold endeavors.
    Anthony

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    • Good Morning Anthony,
      Please forgive me. I did not mean to slight you at all. I value our cyberfriendship. The others merely wished me well. You wished me well AND called me a maniac 🙂 I wasn’t sure “thank you” was the right response to that. Therefore, my “feeble like” was intended to be temporary – until I could think of a better response. But since I really was working like a maniac, I never got back to it.
      Have a wonderful day and, again, I am so sorry that I hurt your feelings. I always look forward to your comments.
      -trb

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      • I guess the real thing I mean to ask of you and perhaps it might be something for you to ponder is this: if it had been one of your close confidantes or an ‘in’ member of your elite clique would you have been so easily off-put by the comment? I knew what I was doing when I made it…I was well aware. If it had been from a woman…would it have made any difference or have been misconstrued? Hmmm…is any of this hitting a nerve yet? You did mean to slight me “fess up” as evidenced by the tone of your capitalized “AND” (I would bold it but that feature is not available here…but picture it bolded for pete’s sake!). You know in the abuses suffered by that little boy at the hands of a fiendish drug addict I relate totally. in my case it was extremely severe and for extended time in my young life 5-7, don’t kid yourself that there are not men out there who relate to such things more than you can possibly know.
        “And”…try a bit more heart and compassion for men as well as for woman, you don’t know everyone’s walk and will not see it while in the pursuit of perfectionism.
        I look forward to your response if you have the ‘ova’ to follow through (ova…in lieu of cojones?, thought that was fairly original?).

        God Bless

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        • I only capitalized AND because I was working from my iPad and it does not give me the option to italicize – which is what I wanted to do.

          I have all kinds of compassion for men. I do know that little boys are abused and I am so sorry that you were one of them. I was a social worker before my daughter was born and I met children who had been through all kinds of horrors. My heart was broken almost daily.

          I have also led a group of men through a post-abortion Bible study. And, I have a husband. So I know that men have feelings, too. And I already apologized for hurting yours. I obviously struck a nerve.

          My “elite inner clique” consists of my husband and my daughter. Both of them know when I am being playful. They understand that I am not shouting when I capitalize AND. And if they don’t, they just ask me to clarify. All this digital ink because one word was misconstrued.

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          • Hence…we come to the subject of the rejection of an offer.
            It is easy to misconstrue in this venue.
            Perhaps that is why I’ve decided to seriously limit my activites or even give them up altogether.
            Difficult to read who is real and who is not, who is sincere and who is not.
            “Digital ink” yup, that about sums it up nicely.
            Like a digital camera I suppose the mp’s the better the resolution.

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              • exchanging e-mails so that we could further such discussions since you have edited and censored my comments in the past.
                your call…
                your prerogative.
                Some people are satisfied with just sharing superficial niceties back and forth in proper eruditeness but not in truth.
                Truth can be an ugly thing sometimes but necessary, in fact essential!
                Honesty is a rare treasure.

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                • I did not see your offer to exchange e-mails, unless you are referring to one you made in the past. I cannot exchange e-mails with anyone because of the whole anonymity thing. Plus, out of respect for my husband, I don’t want to have private conversations.

                  The only comments of yours that I have not approved are the ones in which you asked me not to post them. And sometimes I do not post video clips because I don’t want to bog down the comment section too much.

                  Whatever you want to share anonymously via e-mail, you can share in a comment since nothing gets posted without being approved. Just let me know it is private so I’ll know not to post it.

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  3. Pingback: Raw Footage/Raw Stories | The Reluctant Baptist

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