This is from church today:
First a riddle:
What is greater than God,
more evil than the devil,
the poor have it,
the rich want it,
if you eat it
you will die?
Then a scolding:
The ladies room fills up fast after the sermon and there was already a line when I arrived. My turn was finally up when the handicapped accessible stall became available. So I took it. I prefer the handicapped stalls anyway – they’re nice and roomy and they have handlebars.
Upon exiting the stall I was stared down by a surly-faced old lady with a walker. I was a bit startled to see her because at the time I went in I was the long line’s caboose. “Those stalls are for the handicapped,” she scolded. I was dumbfounded. My first thought was, “You’re at church, be nice.” But I just smiled and said, “It’s all yours.”
Was she just taking her crabby old self out on me, or does she really think that handicapped stalls are on par with handicapped parking spaces? Correct me if I am wrong, but there’s a difference, right?
Handicapped stalls aren’t reserved for those who are handicapped, they are just more accessible. Would she scold someone who walked down a handicapped accessible ramp? Or washed her hands in the lower, wheelchair accessible sink?
And even if she truly believes that the handicapped stalls are indeed reserved for her, still, “You’re at church, be nice.”
Light & life 
Okay, I love this. So real; so funny! I don’t suppose if you aren’t nice outside of church there isn’t much sense in being nice inside it. I love old ladies.
My great-aunt Sarah will be 103 years old this month. She’s in perfect health–just a bit slow moving. I visited her in the nursing home this past summer and when I arrived, she was in the bathroom…for what seemed like FOREVER. I had to travel 100 miles home, so after a long, long wait, I knocked on the bathroom door and asked, “Sarah, are you going to be much longer?”
“What’s it to you if I’m in here all day?!” She snapped.
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I always feel a little awkward when I enter the ‘handicapped’ stall, but you are right, it’s not the same as a parking space. And.. I figured out the riddle, but I won’t say here. It’s a good one!
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I suppose you’re right Lew-Ellyn, crabby people are crabby people no matter the setting. But I think they should rein it in when they enter God’s house, when their great niece drives 200 miles round trip to visit them and at Christmas.
I want the season to be jolly, I want kindness to be met with kindness and I want church to be the one place where I can pee in peace.
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I know the answer to the riddle, too. It’s a good one.
As hard as it is, killing someone with kindness is the most effective way to get your point across. Man, it’s hard though. Good on you.
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