life

I’m Cheap, But I’m Not Easy

I hadn’t been out of the house since I busted my foot – except to go to the doctor twice and take Little One to the vet.  With the help of my sister.

So last night I got gussied up and the hub took me, my boot and the crutches out to dinner.  Not because it was the one year anniversary of my blog, which it was, but because we had some money set aside for fine dining up in Traverse City, and since my bum foot forced us to cancel that trip, we decided to do some fine dining here.

Caesar salad followed by perfectly cooked and seasoned filet mignon, sweet potato casserole, a medley of lightly sautéed summer squash, zucchini and cherry tomatoes and a glass of wine, topped off with a service of truly delicious french press decaf.  By service I mean served with a selection of cream, whipped cream, mini chocolate chips and hunks of raw sugar.  Love that.

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Coincidentally, this picture, taken in May 2014, is the same picture I paired with that very first post.  The year has come full circle.

Yep, yesterday WordPress informed me that I registered my blog and published my first post exactly one year ago. Oooh I was mad that day.

But I don’t want to talk about that.

I want to talk about something I’ve noticed about blogging:

Someone will come along and like one of my posts and/or follow me.

I go check them out, see who they are.

Perhaps they are just looking for reciprocal followers.

I wait.

They comment.  Yay.

They comment again, on another post.  Yay, yay.

They keep reading, they keep commenting.  Yay, yay, yay!

Maybe we’ll become friends.

I follow them back.

Silence.

I’m talking COMPLETE SILENCE.  Not a dwindling of interaction, a complete dumping…. no more likes, no more comments.

I’m perplexed, but not in despair.

I wouldn’t even mention it except that it has happened several times more than once.

Anyone feel me?

Doesn’t that seem like a lot of work for a follow?

Perhaps they just like the thrill of the chase?

Perhaps they are catch-and-release fishers of follows?

Perhaps someone can explain it to me?

I’m only wondering ‘cuz yesterday was the one year anniversary of my blog….

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34 thoughts on “I’m Cheap, But I’m Not Easy”

  1. Hi, I’m Shreya,
    Lovely post. The title of the material really got me. It was a good one. You are a very artful and effortless writer. I look forward to reading more of your work soon.
    I’m relatively new to the blogging forum. Thus, if you get the time please feel free to pay my blog a visit and leave your feedback. Hope you’re having a great summer.
    Smiles,
    Shreya

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  3. Yep, same over here! I know some others too who experienced that. Some peeps are simply looking for followers. As soon as you are hooked they don’t care anymore. So what. I sporadically clean out the blogs I follow.

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      • I never would, Julie! If I follow a blog then I do it because I decided to connect! It can happen that at times I cannot read each and every post, but I will always reply to comments – unless the systems doesn’t threw them into the spam folder…!

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  5. Hey, congratulations! I’m so glad you decided to let the world know exactly who you are on here. Your posts have all taken on a whole fresh life since that day.

    I know what you mean about people following and then not being around any longer. And I’m sure some of them do “follow” just to get others to follow them as well — although I honestly cannot even figure that out. I don’t even care how many “followers” I have. I do want some people to read my posts, because I think they might actually enjoy them or be helped by them. I do offer a good deal of writing advice and, on my ministry blogs, I try to give people good things from the Lord and His Word. But whether or not they bother to “follow” me seems inconsequential. But I suppose some people are caught up in the numbers.

    However, I wouldn’t lump all those people who followed and then didn’t come back into that one category. Sometimes people try to get out there and meet other bloggers, but then about the time they start to get involved, their own personal life takes a turn or two, and they suddenly find that they can’t keep up with the blogging for the time being. Also, I’ve noticed that sometimes WordPress’ “Readers” are not working the way they should. I have had several times when people I’ve followed have no posts showing up in my Reader. They may have shown up for a while, but then they quit coming up, so it looks as though their blogs have no new posts. When I notice that, I go over to their sight and “Unfollow” and then “Follow” again to get the Reader back into gear. So some of those “follow failures” may have been caused by one of these kinds of situations.

    Either way, if you follow someone else, and then discover that they are not into a blogging relationship, you can always just hop over and click “Unfollow,” and move on to the rest of the blogging world, where there are people eager to read what you’ve written. At least on WordPress, most of the people who blog really do want to relate to and interact with other bloggers. I tried a couple of blogs on Google’s Blogger network and deliberately went to scores of sites to introduce myself and try to get to know many of the other people with similar interests. Not one single person even bothered to acknowledge that I had visited and commented — sometimes several times — on their sites. Honestly — not one person even said “Hi.” or “Thanks for the compliment on my work” or anything. I decided to stick with WordPress only and devote my time to people who do seem to care enough to want to communicate personally.

    Many blessings for the next year….

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  6. When a blogger I follow doesn’t post for a few weeks, it’s like losing a friend. But one I don’t know how to check up on! They are just gone. And I wonder if they will come back. What happened? Are they okay?

    There are a few whose comments I crave. If I write a raw, transparent post…will she/he like it? Will they comment? My posts on helping the grieving, I always wait for Linda to comment. As a counselor, I value her opinion.

    Is it pathetic that comments and likes from followers matters so much? When I first started blogging, I didn’t care. I didn’t know. Then I got a taste of likes and comments. They are like drug I crave. Yep, that’s pathetic.

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    • Hi Kathleen, I really miss certain bloggers when they don’t post for awhile, too. Life gets busy I guess. I look forward to the comments of certain people – I guess it’s like hoping to meet up with your favorite co-workers at the water cooler. That’s why I’m afraid to follow them back sometimes – I may never hear from them again!

      Over this past year I’ve learned that bloggerville is like life – most people come and go but, if we’re lucky, a few good ones stick around. Lifelong blogging friends… wouldn’t that be nice?

      I don’t think it’s pathetic to grow fond of the people we meet here and look forward to hearing from them, but, as you know, addiction is never a healthy thing… 🙂

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    • And I hope I’m teaching folks with something. Life does get in my way – I want to dedicate more time to this blogging world, just haven’t figured out how yet.
      But I love love love reading your blog! Thanks, Julie! (Oops)

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  8. Happy anniversary! 😊🎉

    I know I am one of those bloggers who disappear from leaving Likes and comments; I apologize.

    I love your blog, but I’ve been MIA from my own for various reasons. Only now am I slowly getting back out there.

    I subscribe to emails for my favourite blogs (includig yours) so sometimes I don’t get a chance to like or comment when I’m reading on the go.

    Cliché, but it’s not you; it’s me.

    Keep writing and expressing yourself. The people worth connecting with will be there and continue to support you and your blog. You’re a wonderful writer, Julie.

    C.

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  9. Julie, I’ve had the same thing happen and just chalked it up to temporary interest that didn’t go the distance. I’ve followed some blogs, early in my blogging career, that I’ve since lost track of.

    I do value the friends I’ve made here at Word Press. So many interesting people, some funny, others deeply thoughtful, others who know how to leave an encouraging word. I particularly love it when someone engages in a conversation, as has happened with you, Kathleen, Anne, and several others. It’s like having penpals, only better ’cause you don’t have to wait very long for the return letter 🙂

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    • Thanks, Linda, it does feel like pen pals. I always appreciate your comments and I enjoy conversing with you, even when we don’t see exactly eye to eye. Your comments are always thoughtful and respectful. 😀

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  10. In many ways I agree with your comments. However I often wonder how a blog with say a thousand followers can keep the faith with them all. I’m pleased that I can read and reply to your blog as often as possible. As one of you other responders commented, over time if feels as if we all know each other. Glad you were out and enjoying yourself after being house bound. Keep it up.

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    • I don’t mind if someone follows me and says nothing, some people just like to read but they don’t like to comment and that’s fine. And, you’re right, it would be impossible to keep up if everyone commented. It’s just perplexing when someone comments a lot initially and then stops commenting the second I start to follow them. Oh well. I wonder about people who follow thousands of blogs. Following a thousand people, to me, is like following no one. I limit the number I follow because, like you, I want to be able to actually keep up with them.

      You, bones, give great comments and I look forward to them, just as I look forward to reading your posts. I do enjoy feeling like we all know each other. Have a lovely day – or night – I’m never quite sure what time it is there.

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  11. I actually LOL imagining your face as you wondered why people like your page and become silent etc. Why did I laugh? Because my blog-friend Lucile had a similar case and decided to take off her ‘like button’ so that if you are stopping by, you actually do and read the post and comment (if you choose).

    Many people follow me and I go check theirs. But if it’s not what I need, I don’t follow back but keep checking on them whenever they ‘like’ another article, perhaps they have written something interesting and I like that and leave a comment. But whether I want to receive their post everyday (generally) is a matter for another day.

    Happy anniversary to you, Julie. I can see you had fun. Sorry about your foot.

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    • Thank you. I do just what you do, “I go check theirs. But if it’s not what I need, I don’t follow back but keep checking on them whenever they ‘like’ another article, perhaps they have written something interesting and I like that and leave a comment. But whether I want to receive their post everyday (generally) is a matter for another day.”

      And just to be clear, I am happy when someone likes my posts, it’s when they comment, comment, comment and then grow silent as soon as I follow them back that baffles me. If they keep commenting, then I want to get to know them a bit more, so I follow their posts and then they’re gone from mine. Oh well, it doesn’t really matter. It was just an observation for contemplation on my anniversary. Thanks for sharing your experience. I like that! 🙂

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      • Oh! I get this feeling. It seems they just wanted to get your attention and after they have gotten it, leave. Maybe something is up.
        Maybe you should do a post on run-away blog-friends and ask them on a blog hanging-out 🙂 with virtual drinks and cakes smiling at my suggestion.

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  12. I agree that sometimes life just gets in the way. I read in my reader all the time, but rarely have time to read and comment. I do miss some, though, when life gets hectic. I have tons of people tell me they read my blog, since I share posts on Facebook, but they don’t follow…..but I wonder how many of my followers actually read? It’s a tricky game. I try not to overthink it. Happy Anniversary!

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